When and How to Take A Mental Health Day
One part of being in this day and age is that employers and organizations are beginning to understand we cannot be on all the time. We need breaks, and sometimes, those breaks arise suddenly and intensely. Mental health days are days we take to focus on various areas of wellness. Often it is in the realm of physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual wellness. We all need breaks, but we can’t always plan for those off days. Its important to take breaks and vacations that are planned. However, a mental health day in a work-life balance schedule is one where we may decide tomorrow that you are not in the right headspace to handle the day ahead.
Who Needs a Mental Health Day?
This short answer is EVERYONE! One thing I think of is how we take time to rest every single night. This allows our body to mentally and physically recover. When we are under chronic stress, losing sleep, and enter into feelings of lethargy that adds up overtime. If we are not dealing with our stress, getting support, feeling our emotions, or taking breaks, it adds up. Chronic stress takes a bigger toll on our body than we realize. If we are not dealing with our everyday stressors and trauma, it will manifest in some other way. Such as muscle pain, brain fog, oversleeping, low moods, high anxiety, and much more. We all need breaks and everyone needs to have the space to say “ I cannot do take, I need a break”, and then take that space.
How Do I know its Time to Take a Day Off to Focus on You?
There are many ways to tell that your body is getting run down and overwhelmed. While a mental health day cannot fix months of stress, overwhelmed, anxiety, or anger, it is a good start to figure out next steps and get some much needs rest.
Emotional Signs You Need a Day Off:
Exhaustion
Elevated Levels of Anxiety With A Definitive Reason
Bursts of Anger
Stunted Emotions or Crying Spells
Replaying Stressful Events Over and Over ( Rumination)
Feeling overworked and underappreciated
Dreading work each day
Experiencing Panic Attacks
Physical Signs You Need a Day Off:
Poor sleep quality, over sleeping, or sleeping with feeling refreshed
Elevated heart rate
Rapid Breathing
Going to sleep and waking up anxious
You’re not drinking enough water, eating well, or working out
Emotional Eating to Cope
Actions You May Be Taking to Avoid Work and Life Tasks
Feeling your work never ends
Not getting the emotions support you need in relationships
Avoiding work tasks
Missing deadlines
This is not a comprehensive list of what you may be experiencing, but it is here to give you some idea that you are nearing burnout or that you need to take a day to focus on you.
Tips to Plan for A Mental Health Day?
There is not right or wrong way to do a mental health day. The only caveat is that if you are taking time for yourself on a day like this, and someone asks something of you, say no. This extra time isn’t for you to do extra tasks for others. Its a time to focus on what you need so you can get back to what feels whole and healthy to you. I know many of us are students, leaders, parents, committed friends and family members. However, as you’ve heard many times We Cannot Pour From An Empty Cup, We Just Can’t. So if you take this space, its for you and if you need support setting boundaries and being assertive, a blog on this topic will be coming up soon.
Activities That Can Rejuvenate You
Here are a list of things to add to your mental health day routine. One thing to note is this. What we need one day may not be what we need another day. Our needs change day to day and minute to minute. What I encourage you to do is make a list of things that have worked for you in the past and ideas of activties or coping skills you want to try in the future. When you’re having an off day or need some time to heal. First work on managing your immediate symptoms or distress. Then consider trying out a few things that bring joy.
Ideas:
Journal ( What am I feeling, Where am I feeling it, What Do I want to do with this feeling, Where Do I feel stuck, Can I identify these feelings ( refer to emotions wheel)
Read ( try personal growth, a fantasy book, Bible, poetry)
Watch a Show ( I personally like Friends, The Office, or The Big Bang Theory)
Add some joyful movement into your routine ( Hike, Dance, Go on A Walk)
Call a Friend or Family Member ( someone you trust)
Take a Nap ( 20 minutes to an hour in order to note mess with your circadian rhythms)
Make A Healthy Meal
Do Some Breathing Exercises ( Box Breathing 4-4-4-4, Loving Kindness)
Try Meditation ( Try Soulspace, Headspace, or go on YouTube)
Turn to God
I Feel Guilt and Shame for Taking Time Off!
This particular set of emotions resonates with me personally. I have a complicated relationship with shame and guilt. Shame is a feeling that you are bad, worthy of contempt, or inadequate as a person. It is the idea that we have done something that goes against some belief, rules, or moral codes. Whereas guilt is the feeling of remorse or responsible for something you've done wrong or perceived you did wrong. Here is the think as women of color we are trained to internalize our feelings. Some people grow up in a space where they are more comfortable saying no, asking for help, setting boundaries, and taking time off. We have been systemically trained to take it all in and not complain.
Furthermore, when we do address microaggressions or the need for a break, employers, professors, and others in your life may overlook your need for support because unfortunately the trope of the strong black woman means we keep pushing through. If this resonates with you know that you deserve to have the space to take a step back. Its easy to listen to these messages and take them in deeply. However, we need to assert our needs and rest. The Lord rested and so should we. We cannot take it all in.
Additionally, know that some of these messages may come from our own families. It may feel weird to go against what we were taught, but again, you’re your own person. Even if you don’t through out the entire rule book, begin to become more aware of when you are starting to not be able to fully function. What does that mean for you and does it benefit you to continue to ignore how you’re feeling.
Navigating Emotions During A Sudden Mental Health Day
If you do decide to take a mental health day, you may be navigating a whole slew of emotions, shame and guilt for needing a break ( hustle culture reinforces this), sadness and an overwhelming sense of stress, anxiety, or anger. One thing that I am learning as I go through school is that there are tools we can refer to for us to deescalate out emotions. These are called distress tolerance tools. The truth is that when we are emotionally flooded sometimes trying to solve problems isn’t the best way to approach life. We don’t always have to fix everything and if that is the way you handle things, first see how this behavior services you and where it comes from. Here are a few tools for you to utilize.
Self-Soothing/5 Senses
5 things I see
4 things I feel
3 Things I Hear
Two Things I Smell
One Thing I Taste
Pros and Cons Skills
Describe the behavior and crisis you want to avoid
Examine the pros/cons of acting on your behavior/acting on your urges
What Are the advantages and disadvantages ( pros/cons) for each option
Radical Acceptance
In order to radically accept, we have to fully and completely accept the moment. That means releasing bitterness, acknowledging reality as it is ( we are not trying to change it), accepting the future has limitations and that everything has a cause. We also acknowledge that life is work living and pain cannot be dismissed or ignored. This is perhaps one of the most challenging to do, but can give you an immense amount of peace when practiced. Know that radical acceptance does not mean we have to like what is happening.
Want some more tips, check out DBT tools.com
A Word to the Wise
A mental health day is for everyone and you deserve a break to heal and recover from whatever you’re dealing with. If you have questions or need support. I am here to give you insight but know that some things are beyond my scope. A skilled life coach or mental health professional can help you work through the exhaustion, stress, anger, and burnout you may be experiencing. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. You deserve space for yourself!
Get the support you need from a coach who understands!
If you're looking to take your life and career to the next level, then my coaching services are perfect for you! With 45-minute calls for disordered eating and body image, assertiveness and boundaries, 15-minute consultations, or even limited-time 20-minute mini-sessions, I'm here to help you gain clarity, find direction and make real progress on your goals. Plus, through additional blogs with helpful resources targeted towards BIPOC women, professionals dealing with disordered eating, and assistance with assertiveness and boundaries, I'm here to help you discover your fullest potential. Now is the time for you to take charge of your life--be brave, be bold, and be proactive! Invest in yourself today and see how far you can go! Take the first step towards a brighter future and contact me for your free consultation. Together, we can make the most of this journey!